Tuesday, July 31, 2007
My dearest one,
We've come a long way together, and sometimes it feels like it's not near far enough. I know I hurt you with my blog yesterday and for that I offer you my humblest apologies. I know almost all of our problems stem from my neediness but knowing is not going to make it go away. I need and crave your touch so much that when we go weeks or even months with no touching it hurts me so much inside. I just want to curl up and die. I also know that your not getting much out of the deal. It tears me up inside that I can't transport you like you do me make your insides melt and your head explode with pleasure. For thats what you give me every time you touch me. I want that for you as well. Maybe if just once you felt that you'd know why I get so depressed and seek the company of others at times just to try to feel that closeness. Thing is no one will ever be you or be able to make me feel the way you do. I still feel as though you took the journey into the lifestyle as once again a way to bind me closer to you. I'm sorry you have to find ways to do that. I truly think that maybe I was wrong about needing this path in life at this time. I think that for now we should just concentrate on being husband and wife and put aside other dynamics till we work that out. I'd still like to go to the Munch's and learn all I can but not worry about anything else for the present. I met you when I was 17 lonely, depressed, and needing to get away from my own house and problems. You took me in showed me love, and gave your life to me. If I haven't said it enough your my world and I don't want to see that crumble through misunderstanding and lies. I'll I've ever wanted was a bit of time each day wrapped in your arms where the whole world can go to hell and it's just you and me. I go crazy when I don't get that and I apologize for causing so much pain and confusion between the two of us. I loved you being Dominant and I loved submitting to you, but till I know your ready I'm not going to listen and obey when I don't always think your right nor do I feel you always listen or see me. Please don't take this the wrong way, I'm not rejecting you or saying I wont do something when you ask. I just need a breather from the expectations I have and the anger and sadness I get when there not being met. So I'm not going to expect you to keep me from trouble or solve my need for pain now and then. I'll deal with my issues my own way, and just try to learn to accept you the way you are.
Monday, July 30, 2007
My Dearest Master,
Well it's been a very rocky road for us, and some reason the path doesn't seem to be getting clearer does it? I have to give you my apologies I know I've been a SAM lately. I've been pushing and pushing just to get you to push back, but your to even tempered to take the bait. I've purposely stayed on chat when you've told me to get off, and have logged on when you've told me not to. Why do I try to push you to your limit? I can't answer that in all truthfulness? Maybe I'm trying to get you to show reaction. Maybe I am a pain slut and crave the punishment, or maybe it's just to see if your paying attention or not. I can't self analyze myself, but I know it's wrong and I shouldn't be doing so. Though to be honest I'll probably keep doing so. You know I spend most of my time online with the one known as MsSquirt and I know you don't approve and won't let me officially call her my Domme though I love her with all my heart. I know I've hurt you in the past and your afraid I'll leave,but that is the furthest thing from my mind. MsSquirt makes me feel so good about myself, and makes me a better person just by knowing her. Yes I'd like to develop a relationship with her including visits and phone calls, but it would never take me from you. You've said you need time, but it's been months and the answer from you is still no so I sneak to see her, because I can't give her up. I don't want lies or dishonesty between us anymore. That is what attracted me to the lifestyle n the first place. You told me no assignments from her yet I still do them if she asks because I know she has my best interests at heart and everything she gives me to do improves and makes me a better person. You can ban me from talking to her, but then I'd still be sneaking behind your back and I don't want this. I don't want to be frustrated and thinking of leaving anymore. I want honesty and understanding and maybe I'm asking for too much. Honesty is really hard for me and just writing this knowing it will hurt you tears me up inside as well. Most of the times in our life when I have been dishonest it was because I knew something would hurt you. For me I'm so empathetic with what others are feeling I feed off that so there pain hits me harder then my own. If I'm around motivated people then I'm more motivated and that is something this family isn't very at all. If I saw someone else cleaning doing something then I do more, and in our house no one does much of anything. So yes I sit and say this this and this should be done, and yet might do one of those things I have going in my head. I don't want to be like this and don't know how to change. Just the fact that I've stuck with the no caffeine and swimming daily shows that I can do things even without encouragement or help. I want to improve myself and go further then I've gone before. I want to be a better person, and I need help do to that. You've always been an enabler for me. Unfortunitly not in a good way. If I'm sick and whiny you let me call out of work more often then not. If I'm whining about wanting caffeine you tell me to go get some even if I'm trying to give it up. If I don't want to do something right away you say fine do it later. Well I guess you see what I mean. When I first met you and was still in high school when I didn't want to go you encouraged me to stay home. So the pattern started early in our relationship. I realize that you were just trying to let me do what I wanted to do and in that way show your love for me, but it has not helped me to be a better person. I think we both need to improve ourselves and get our lives on track. How can you be in control of me when you can't take charge of yourself? I'm tired of when I ask Katie to do something or my mother does you say she's done enough or don't bother her. We ask her to do very little and I'm proud of her when she does help out. Your being her enabler too and letting her get away with just sliding through life, and I don't want this anymore. The room issue is just out of hand anymore. There is no reason she should not have had it clean months ago, but you let her make excuses stop to watch TV and whatever else she can think of to procrastinate and not do it. We are all huge procrastinators and I really would like to see that come to an end. We're just skating through life not making a difference not doing anything, and I just feel that's so wrong. I want to feel good about my decisions every day. I want people to look at me and know they can depend on me if they need to. This marathon all day TV watching of yours is that any better then me being on here chatting? I'm sorry Sir I'm not trying to make you feel bad, and am sure I have but this is stuff that has been festering inside ready to boil over forever. I've said nothing, because I'm so scared of making people angry, hurt, or upset but I don't want to keep things bottled up till the explode in unhealthy ways anymore. When I say something and you hush me up or tell me you've taking care of it and you haven't it really hurts me. This bit with you thinking your protecting us and making us happy spending money on other stuff besides bills has got to stop. Bills first before play. I've said all along that I've grown up since I've been with you and you've never changed. Can you change? Can you be a responsible adult in charge of not only his life but his wifes and daughters as well? Your always going to be on pain meds there's always going to be stress but this can't be used as excuses anymore. I know it's hard to get up and get moving and the depression wears you down. I know this. Watching you sit day after day watching same TV shows drinking tons of soda letting life just pass by is killing me. I had one goal in high school get away from my parents and never come back. This is where we are now. Is owning your own home such a huge goal its impossible? I lied when i said I wasn't thinking of leaving anymore earlier in this letter. That's false because I think it all the time. When I ask Katie to do something, and you tell me to leave her alone she's done enough. When we sit watching same damn TV shows over and over, and all you have eyes for is the TV. When I cry myself to sleep at night because I so want you to kiss and touch me and your watching a movie not seeing nor hearing me. When I sit here in the morning for hours all by myself talking to people hundreds of miles away from me knowing it will be hours before either you or Katie stirs and then even longer before your awake enough to think of doing anything. I hurt so bad at times it burns and yet I say and do nothing. I just watch the days pass us by and let ennui slip in. It's not living it's just waiting. Waiting for nightfall so the whole thing can replay day after day merging so hard to tell one day from the next. How long have you been saying you were going to do something about your chair. You just accept they won't replace it won't fix it and you won't fight. Same things with the kids we know were going to have to be responsible we need a place to live were we can take them, and we need a job so we can afford them. These things aren't just going to drop in our lap while we sit idly by. Only took you how many years to take care of my ticket? I hope everything doesn't wait that long to be taking care of I truly do. I do love you, I love the man I see inside of you. The man I want to see come out and take charge. The one that doesn't make excuses that knows who and what he is and is proud of that. It's taking me 35 years to accept who and what I am, how long will it take you?
your dark angel
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Huggssssssssssssssss to all. Put my kittens in the paper and got three calls today, but only one person actually came to see them. Worked out though they took two. Of course they took Fred and Gorge the two friendliest ones so were stuck with the duds. I've been feeling anti social today. Had a migraine again all day from the drastic Florida summer weather changes. Feels like 100 degrees one minute then sun goes away and it's storming like mad. Goes down to like 80 in no time flat. While we need the cooler air and the water is nice my sinus's take a beating from it. Sinus pressure sucks and sinus migraines even more so. I wish I wasn't so damned flawed. Asthma, allergies, Migraines, rosacia, ingrown toenails, hearing problems, and learning disabilities. Sometimes I wonder if I just got everyone else's problems? It's hard for me to feel good about myself, and even harder to believe in myself but I'm trying. When I was younger I wrote poetry to help with depression, but when I met my husband he thought my stuff was strange and I stopped writing. I know he meant nothing by his comments it just wasn't anything he understood but I'm so needy that I need others to approve what I do. I've got back into writing again and it's a great release. I still feel my stuff isn't that good and don't share most. I eat up all the good comments though one bad and I'll probably want to crawl into a hole. Master wrote a lovely blog today on MDS made me teary eyed. He doesn't express emotion often so when he does it's very special to me. It came at a good time when I was feeling pretty low and like we were drifting apart again. I still have issues though mainly with myself. I expect so much and I disappoint myself all the time. I can look around and catalog things that need doing, but half the time keep putting off the doing. I'm lazy I guess. I'll do one or two things then come here to chat, or watch TV or come up with some other excuse not to do what needs doing in my mind. I'm actually surprised that I haven't quit the morning swim yet. Food is becoming another issue with me. I still have some weight I want to loose but it's hard to eat nutritiously when your a Southerner and your family loves everything fried. My goal is to get to a size 12 but I can't seem to get lower then a size 14. I've come down from a size 22 and seem to have reached my plateau and not able to do more. Even the swimming daily seems to be making no difference. I've decided no matter what I do anyway I'm never going to be satisfied with me. Ah well enough whining from me..........
Friday, July 27, 2007
Well no new developments so far. Don't know whats going to happen with the kids. His mother thinks there here so keeps calling us. We don't' want her to know where they are. Master teased this girl sucking her tits and spanking her earlier but she drank two beers before bedtime and now just wants to pass out. Ah well maybe in morn will be able to start something so doubtful....... can't write anymore because having trouble writing since can't see straight..night all.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Well is many know my sister in law passed away three months ago. Well her two children have been staying with there grandma in a one bedroom low income housing since then. Me and Master live with my parents and we all help out, but theres no room for them here. His other sister Fran wants them but she just wants there social checks they'll be getting and she had her own kids taking by DCF growing up so she's not the best place for them. Tonight my 11 year old nephew called petrified of his grandma. She's always been a bit crazy, and very controlling and has got worse since her daughter died. She's tried to turn the kids against every one in family and pretty much isolate them with just her old crazy self. They had been to stay with there Aunt Fran for the weekend and soon as they came in she started yelling and grilling them about everything they did, and everything that was said. She has a persecution complex and thinks everyone talks about her all the time. She pulled the 11 year old Joey into the bathroom and threatened to slap him he was petrified. We went and took the kids and called DCF on her so now we have to figure out what to do. Well this will really help mine and Masters intimacy problems won't it? Sighs and wonders away inconsolable....
Monday, July 23, 2007
Well guess last nights blog didn't go over to well, but Master wasn't angry just said I needed to talk to him more but it's very hard for me to do. Obvously I feel I can't talk about somethings cause he just won't listen. He says he needs time but what hard could an online Domme do. I just don't understand his need of time nor his absolute refusal. Just accepting that would make me a lot more complaint with other things. Now he says he's going to train me harder, but train me for what and to do what? My head hurts like hell this week the no soda isn't helping my rosacia and I feel worse then ever. Hopefully sun will come out tomorrow....
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Why blog nothing happens in my life anyways? I've turned into a stay at home do nothing mom. Hubby has said over and over he was going to go get a job, but that doesn't seem to be happening. He's also said we'd go look together well that's not happening either so what's the point? Me calling him Master has changed nothing. I thought for a while it did our relationship was better more open and sex was great. Once again that's all falling to the wayside. He promised it wouldn't this time, but it's not the first time I've heard that either. One of the things that so attracted me to the lifestyle was the honesty, but that's not happening here either. If Master doesn't wish to hear what I'm saying he shuts me down before I even can get my plea out. He's not listening to my needs nor meeting them. He didn't even seem to notice that I'd stopped daily blogging. Nor that I had erased all my online yahoo conversations once just cause I was angry. I so want to have a relationship that's honest and open, but if he shuts out the things I say how can that be? He thinks online relationships are false and people are just out to hurt you. I know that's untrue and have had friends online for longer then off line actually. Moving around so much is a kid I got used to making shallow friendships that way saying goodbye and never seeing them again didn't hurt so much. I'm not sure he'll accept me being bi or let me explore that part of me and it really hurts. This is something I've repressed for my whole life, and now I can finally accept it but if he can't I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to repress it anymore. Hell if truth full I'd have probably been a lesbian if I'd have found someone to take me. I grew up with the attitude that it wasn't healthy or right though so I never let it out, but I've dreamed of females long before I ever dreamed of males. Another thing that's bothering me is his refusal to even think about a mentor or playing with others. There is so far I want to go, so much I want to try and do, and I don't see it ever happening with him. Hence I found someone willing to Domme me online take me a bit further, but that was shut down immediately too. He wouldn't even hear how much it meant to me leading to lies that I didn't want. Instead of supporting me and helping me on this journey he took it where he wanted it to go and no further. I'm feeling caged in and helpless. Do I love him? I think I do but it's so muddled through all the pain and heart ache between us. Can we be saved? I just don't know anymore. I thought this would open up our world but instead he's just using the lifestyle to bind me more to his will. Sometimes I wonder if he truly understands the love and trust between a Dom and there sub. How strong the bond is between them. He has to know me as well is I know him, and he never has. He doesn't understand how much I crave touch and need his arms around me at night. How I cry myself to sleep some nights when rebuked for being to bouncy. My body tries to say what my heart and head can not, and all I get is punished for it. I'm sick and tired today. Probably wasn't the best time to try to explain myself, yet the pain was burning inside and had to come out. I hurt the person online that means the most to me and it's tearing me up inside bringing all the old pains so much closer to the surface. In side I'm still the ugly red headed child who'd throw herself at any one for a scrap of affection. The girl who doesn't believe in herself. The one who just wants to stay home and serve and doesn't even do that well. What am I? Nothing and no one.....
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
I know haven't posted in a few days. Guess just haven't had much to say really. Plus was really tired and a bit sick last night so went to bed early. Have stuck with my swimming and pretty much with my caffeine free lifestyle. Have cheated here and there but less then one a week which I don't think is to bad. Mainly when were out and share a drink. Had my great niece who was sick all day today. That was lots of fun she was hot and miserable. Hope I don't get sick from her. Other then that have just played online all day. Master has started ignoring my time here again, not sure why. I didn't mind him limiting my time long as was allowed a few hours in morning and at night that is the main time I talk to others anyway....
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Ahhhhhhhhhh no kid and everyone comes home tomorrow. No more being naked all day. No more swimming in pool naked. I've so enjoyed this weekend. We did knife play last night and Master left some good welts. He spanked me and made me so alive and aware of my body it left me weak after. To bad just was such a short time...sigh
Friday, July 13, 2007
Got rid of everyone in the house for a few days. Finely yea. I get to let the slave free. Swim naked run around naked with just my slave collar on. Get spanked all day long. Of course took forever to have the empty house just so we could have a little private time. Had two kids stay the night last night so no luck there. Took forever to get them moving this morning so we could drop them at grandma's house and rush back home for that private time. We showed up and my nephew was here watching TV. The big ape stayed around for over an hour damn it, by time he left my sister showed up with her dog. I thought we were going to have a never ending parade of people through the house, but she finally left after rummaging through drawers and cabinets snooping everywhere. Soon as she left Master called me to him and yanked me down to the floor by my hair. He stripped my clothes off me and gave me a quick spank with promise of more later. He's made me serve for a few hours like that and every time I go by he pulls on my nipples or spanks my ass so I'm more then ready for some playtime. Ta ta.....
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Lets see my niece was up early don't think she slept well on the floor. I know they were up till after four giggling and chatting so they should all be tired tonight. Well except for the one that got up early she took a long nap close to dinner time. Had to meet mother in law at lawyers first thing this afternoon to talk about case. The lawyer wants to make Master the legal guardian for the kids. This pissed off his sister Fran who wanted custody as she saw there money flying out the window. After took his mother out to Mexican food so she could vent and maybe wouldn't call us all day. After Master had a doctor's appointment to try to get something to wake him up from the med that makes him sleepy, so we didn't get home till after two. Made roast, tators, and biscuits for dinner. Other then that have just floated through rest of day had huge storm so was offling for a bit. Story done nothing else to tell....
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Harry Potter in 3 more hours. I know because I've been giving a constant countdown. Master said we'd play before I left but he hasn't called me yet. Took the teen to breakfast this morning get a little alone time for just me and her. Picked up a book on chain mail jewelry from the library. Now if could just find some cheap links to buy I'll be in business. Katie liked quiet a few of the earrings in the book. Can't wait to try out some. Hmm other then that have nothing to write...huggles and ttfn.....
Monday, July 9, 2007
One more night till Harry Potter movie...I can't forget because my daughter won't let me. She is very hyper and excited tonight hope she sleeps in tomorrow because movie doesn't start till midnight. Have been real good about the caffeine and swimming this week. Even got the bathroom cleaned so slowly working on my list. My great niece came over today and immediately brought me my shoes and watch, then went and got grandma her shoes and purse. So guess who went out following a baby Dommes orders...lol. We went and got pizza which she loved then drove around an hour while she slept..no we are not whipped. Other then that cleaned and wrote today not much else. Master did pull my hair and play with me a bit. He got out his knife and ran it all over my body. Only problem was some reason I was in a very giggly mood today and laughed every time he touched me. Even with the knife I was laughing hysterically and moving in to the blade instead of away from it so he stopped. Of course at bedtime tonight he probably won't be in mood to play..sigh. Hopefully I'm wrong on that.
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Master slept for long time today after being up all night. They didn't come in till power was back on at 6 am so him and Katie were tired. I did take advantage and had an all day chat fest..least till my ass got so sore couldn't sit anymore. Katie had plans to go to see a movie with her friends so took them out to the movies. came home at 10 and ordered a late night pizza for a snack..yum. Don't know if I'm going to get in trouble for being on line all day or not yet. Master did say had to go straight to bed after pizza no chat...ah well.
Ahhhhhhhhh no power...it's almost seven am and we just got power back. Last nights munch was fun we had show and tell on toys. A lot of people make there own paddles and floggers. One showed a homemade vamp roller. It's just a lint brush with tacks stuck all the way around it, and black electric tape wrapped around the tacks to keep them in so the little points are all pointing out. It is a toy that will draw blood. I'm exhausted and going back to bed for a few, but had to come here first. I'm addicted to friends and not used to going to bed without saying goodnight and seeing some of my best friends. When we first got back from munch and released power was off we went to IHOP for a late night dinner since the power was supposed to be back on at midnight. When we got back from that and power was still off we spent an hour in Walmart before coming home. Still no power so we stayed up talking. I finally gave up and went to bed heat or no heat, but Master and my daughter didn't. They finally went and watched a movie on a portable dvd player in the air conditioned car all night so my gas is probably low. Ok don't even know what I'm typing now so I'd better get..huggsssssss and kisses to any who read my boring ramblings. Say hi sometime.
Master Ed's dark angel
Friday, July 6, 2007
Friday yea...why yea I haven't a clue. Cause it's Friday I guess. Your supposed to go yea Friday right? All I did today was clean and do laundry. Bathed my kittens and took them in to our local pet store for them to sell. They would only take two. They didn't take Misty my stray so I guess I'm stuck with another female...dang it. The idiot at the pet store opened the box they had her in and she took off through store I caught her and put her back in box and the guy let her escape again they had to close doors to catch her the second time. They said she was to wild as she set in my arms and purred. She was just scared. Stopped at taco bell for Master only thing is he told the teen to tell me he wanted a taco salad and she didn't. So he wasn't to happy with her. Has been pouring all day again today, and was out getting soaked for a bit. The teen was bored so we took a drive to dunking dough nuts to pick out some fattening dough nuts for the weekend. She wanted to practice driving, but I vetoed that not in this rainy weather. Think I'm actually going to go to bed pretty early tonight. Am a bit exhausted. Plus during rainy weather I get sinus migraines from the air pressure. So my head feels like it's going to explode. Have a great weekend to all.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Got my tickets in hand for next weeks midnight showing..yea me. My daughter has had her Harry Potter outfit picked out for months to wear to this. She has a Death Eaters hat she got so long ago I don't remember she has not worn, because she was saving it for this showing. She got her hair cut real short today so her hat would fit good..lol. We walked through the mall all day and Master bought a rotor thing to make paddles with. We were at the mall forever...I wish we could find some place else to go beside our little rink dinky mall I'm so tired of it. Other then that haven't done much today so have nothing to write. Master handcuffed me to bed the other night. Had been a while since I've been used so well used and I really enjoyed it.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Wasn't to great of a day actually for me. Master had plans to go see a movie with nephews, and my parents had to go pick up my nephew in Orlando. Was going to take my daughter out and get our hair cuts. I know I'm beginning to look like a woolly mammoth with my shaggy head of hair. It gets so thick at times. Well I discovered quickly none of the hair cutter's were open nor was much else, so we ate at Wendy's and headed home. No one I wanted to talk to was online, Katie fell asleep on the couch and I was bored to tears actually. Starting feeling kind of depressed and down. I made a ham, but was no one here to eat it. Master finally came home after five, and my parents showed up not much after that with my nephew Zachery that's staying her for a month. He's not a bad kid, but he's still pretty annoying. I offered to take him and Katie down to the beach to see the fireworks. We actually got there less then five minutes before they started and got a great spot sitting up on the dunes right behind where the barge was that was shooting them off. Katie hates loud noises so really wasn't enjoying herself. It's been years since I've seen fireworks for just that reason. I go for the kids and my kid has never enjoyed them. Zach loved it though. We lost Katie in the press of the crowd and she didn't reemerge for almost twenty minutes. I wasn't to thrilled with her by that time. Her and Zach argued like brother and sister all the long walk back to the car. Least he shouldn't miss his sister and brother for the month he's here. Verdict is still out on wither he's a pest or not. Am sure within a day will be able to say one way or another. Took another hour to get out of the parking lot down by the beach and get home so didn't get home till almost eleven pm. Was a good evening though, and I do think the kids enjoyed it. Master is still limiting my online time. Think he read some of my yahoo archives and maybe didn't like my chat, but he hasn't really said one way or another. I do play a lot, but that's all it is. I tell people I love them and mean it, but not like I love Master. Ah well he's in control so it matters not. Tomorrow going to the mall to pick up our tickets for the midnight showing of Harry Potter next week..yea.
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
My mom dragged me to Orlando today to see my spoiled niece at college. Wasn't a fun trip. I had taking a sleeping pill last night, because I've been very tired lately and not sleeping well. I slept alright but have been exhausted still all day so don't think I'll do that again. Soon as got home rested for a bit and had to go back out to cash checks and do some shopping so was a long day out. Was storming as well so got soaked getting Master back in car after shopping. Master has cut my time off on chat completely. He is getting very stern on times now and limiting my chat time. I did throw a tantrum today, but he quietly and quickly got me under control. I apologized for the fit but he said was his fault because hes giving me to much free reign and he was going to take care of that...sigh. So if you don't see me much anymore you know why. I love all my friends online and am very sorry I'm not going to be around as much. It's ten o'clock and I have to go to bed. My apologies for short post tonight.. but have been staying up later and later and my attitude is showing the lack of sleep. Huggssssssssss hope all had a happy tied up Tuesday.
Monday, July 2, 2007
Yea did my swimming today. OK I only skipped the week of my monthly but still facing that cold water is a mind hurdle every day. I cheated and had half a can of Dr. Pepper yesterday not to mention a coke slushy from seven eleven. Surely coke slushies don't count? Today was good even though did grab a quick meal at McDonald's got lemonade with my meal instead of soda. I stayed online till midnight last night. Master told me I could stay up as late as I wanted, but he's not letting me chat today. So instead wrote a lot of blogs in MDS. My mom agreed to watch the baby today so of course she's been under my feet most of the day. My niece still owes me money so refuses to ask me to watch her. Master stole my bra today as well. Guess he thought I didn't need one when no one was home. I drive him nuts though because for some reason when he pinches or bites me I laugh hysterically. I just can't help it and don't know why. Wanted to finish reading a book today, but was really to tired to concentrate on the words so gave it up. Not only did I stay up till midnight chatting stayed up till three even though i was in bed watching titanic on a portable DVD player. Then I slept really fitfully and was still up at my usual time of about six. I did manage to catch a bit more sleep on and off till about eight but think I will turn in early today.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Lets see Sunday what did I do? Well after getting in so late last night didn't get to bed till one and slept horribly. Was awake by six am. Did my swimming yesterday and today, but haven't got my laps back up yet to what they were before the four day break in swimming. Master was cuddly a bit this morning before sending me on my way. He tantalized me with hints of later, so was moist thinking of later all morning. Finally around eleven went and poked him with a ruler I'd found. A big thick wooden ruler and did get my needs taking care of, but got bopped on head with ruler. Well wasn't where I wanted it used but it works...lol. Went to take teen some clothes today because she wanted to stay at grandma's house but instead she decided to come home. Went to library and I got bridge over the river kwi again. Starts whistling the music. Other then that just procrastinating all day. Cooked a good dinner for Master and everyone else of course...lol. Have a lovely upcoming week one and all....